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Dirk Flinthart's Whimsies seek refuge

By Dirk Flinthart - posted Monday, 15 October 2001

The growing refugee crisis is a cause for concern the world over. Millions of displaced people have left their homes, seeking shelter from disasters of all sorts. Most commonly, we hear about those who are pursued by the spectres of starvation, warfare, political repression, and disease -- but what of the others? What of the hidden tide of refugees, often from countries that most of us consider to be wealthy and civilized? What of these people? Who will address their plight?

Here at onlineopinion we are prepared to take the forefront in the battle for recognition of the situation of these victims. Today, we bring you the harrowing story of – the Forgotten Refugees.

Britain: For centuries, inhabitants of the British Isles have suffered the most fearful forms of repression. Even today, there are matters afoot in England which should shock and appal civilized people everywhere –


1) Mushy peas: a cruelty which has to be seen to be believed. As if this wasn't bad enough, innocent civilians are forced to dress up as mushy peas, thus violating what little dignity remains to them:

Wisely, the EU has attempted to ban this unspeakable culinary practice, but the vicious ruling regime of cooks in England is putting up a tough resistance.

2) Status Quo: I don't think I can explain this. In fact, nobody can explain this. Not even Mick Jagger. You'll have to figure it out for yourself.

Shouldn't these people be in a nursing home somewhere?

3) The Windsors: The first thing you have to understand is that the following website is entirely serious. Once you can grasp that, the full magnitude of the horror can reach you, and you will understand why the British have been fleeing in their hundreds of thousands, often with no more than backpacks strapped to them, to dwell in Australia - at the other end of the world.


Just in case you thought that was a one-off, check out this site: Is there any end to the terrors endured by the suffering British?

Britain is not the only Western country with a refugee crisis, however. We must not forget the redoubtable United States of America. With the highest proportion of its population imprisoned of any nation in the world, it is no wonder that people are fleeing America in droves. Some of the terrors which haunt that nation are almost unbelievable - yet they are true, and we must bear solemn witness...

1) Harder to kill than Count Dracula and Osama Bin Laden rolled into one; more tasteless than a hundred Liberaces, its the one, the only Elvis Presley, Scourge of the South! This site shows how even now, Americans are living in terror of this eternally undead rock-and-roller:

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About the Author

Dirk Flinthart is a writer and student who lives in Tasmania.

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