Call to remember the old Order of Australia

Until recently, this was manifested mainly in the choice of education and career, sexual activity and human relationships, philosophical and spiritual influences that caused the most consternation in intergenerational debates.

With world economies going into spontaneous meltdown however, it is the subject of ageing and aged care that is suddenly leaping to the forefront as countless well-laid plans are torn asunder or tossed out the window.

On one hand are the Forgotten Ethnic Generation, who tend to regard aged care as one domain where the options proffered by bureaucrats are by definition grossly inferior to those provided by family and friends. A belief founded on the expectation that younger family members will reciprocate the care given by their elders as the latter become sickly, frail and incapacitated in an authentic ethnic and cultural context.

On the other hand are the Ethnic Baby Boomers who like to think that the modern aged care system in Australia should have progressed to a point that all seniors, irrespective of cultural, ethnic or linguistic background, can expect to have their special needs suitably and sensitively catered for.

This divergence in views can make for painful confrontations between loved ones. Even when older parties agree that the general aged care system should better reflect the needs of Australia’s diverse seniors population, the realisation that their children would feel more comfortable delegating their primary care-giving responsibilities to others outside the family can be quite shattering.

A dedicated campaign to educate Ethnic Baby Boomer and the Forgotten Ethnic Generation about these issues would do much to prompt much-needed discussions about what constitutes “duty of care” and “obligation to prepare.”

That is not to say that such conversations will be easy. Any reflection on the costs of human mortality and the value of close family ties is bound to be awkward, embarrassing and potentially traumatic for all involved. Hence the need for a supportive and sensitive atmosphere complete with suitably trained counsellors, especially when it appears likely that the expectations of one party are in discord with the wishes of the other.

What is certain is this is an issue that won’t go away and the tendency for some families to avoid the discussion, whether inadvertently or by design, can only serve to exacerbate the tension and distress caused when the moment for serious decisions inevitably does arrive.

Then again, if the whole process of ageing and aged care was simple, straight-forward and free of misunderstanding, millions of families in Australia and around the world wouldn’t have found Mother and Son anywhere near as funny, familiar and cathartic.

I have no doubt that psychologists and aged care professionals were among the first to applaud the recent honour bestowed upon Geoffrey Atherden last month. Many appreciate that his uncompromising (albeit comically enhanced) depiction of the everyday plight of dementia sufferers and the stress on their families shone a vital light upon an aspect of our society that continues to be treated with indifference, suspicion and frustrating levels of ignorance.

We can only hope that a similar measure of attention will soon be finally afforded to another order of Australians whose struggles and contributions have gone unremembered for far too long. Whether they are our direct family or not, these Forgotten Ethnic generations helped form the backbone of this nation and it is a debt that all of us are obliged to help repay.