Those kinky Hebrews: marriage in the Judeo-Christian scriptures

A virgin who is raped must marry the rapist with no possibility of divorce. But the rapist must pay the father 50 shekels for his property loss. A bride who is discovered after the wedding not to be a virgin must be killed.

Biblical marriage, anyone?

The argument that God disapproved of multiple partners but tolerated and regulated it – as with divorce– is unfounded. There is no hint anywhere that polygamous, same-sex or extramarital unions are intrinsically wrong. Some may be, but not all. Yes, Solomon was rebuked for taking too many foreign wives. But nationality was the problem there, not multiplicity. Although 700 does look a bit greedy.

God’s prophet told King David he could have had even more wives had he wanted. This is just not possible if polygamy was in any way sinful.

The New Testament, in contrast, teaches clearly against marriage, proclaiming celibacy as the preferred option for followers of Christ.

“It is good for a man not to touch a woman”, Paul instructs. And later, “He who marries does right, but he who does not marry does better.”

Marriage is grudgingly permitted for the weak and then regulated. Slaves, wives and children are all subordinate to the husband. There is one commandment in the New Testament requiring one wife. That applies to bishops or elders only.

So where did the curious idea arise that Biblical marriage is one-man-one-woman? It appears to have originated from a poetic piece set in the Garden of Eden, a passage often read at weddings.

Genesis chapter 2 says: (24) “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (25) And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.”

Clearly, say conservatives, this has the words “a man” and “his wife”. End of argument.

Increasingly, however, scholars say this does not deal definitively with questions of number, gender, race or anything else regarding marital partners. Rather, it is snapshot of the first union between Adam and Eve affirming that partnerships should be permanent, and that newlyweds should not live with his parents. That’s about all.

Singular terms in Scripture, scholars advise, often imply plural. And vice versa. For example, the tenth commandment instructs us not to “covet thy neighbour’s house, thy neighbour’s wife, nor his man-servant, nor his maid-servant, nor his ox, nor his ass…”

These are all singular terms, but clearly imply plural. Similarly, instructions to fathers to “not provoke your children” apply to fathers with only one child.

So restricting Genesis 2:24 to just one spouse fails. Besides, they ask, how can we apply verse 24 rigidly today, but not verse 25?