Get yourself a cross-action stimulator, dual effect massager, with comfort grip!

It felt strangely comforting.

Given the price and design of some of these brushes I was regretting not having bought a colour swatch of the bathroom tiles to ensure that my new brush was going to tone with the room. There is so much going on with some of these toothbrushes you want to make sure that it is going to fit in to its new environment.

Conventional toothbrush holders can now only be used as accessory trays as giant launch pads must be fitted to accommodate the new rocket ships from planet brush.

Thunderbirds are go.

I am sure my old brush didn’t have soft gum stimulators with outstanding sonic cleaning. What exactly is sonic cleaning? I am obviously so out of touch with the modern world. I really need a fix of teeth cleaning to restore my fresh confidence.

It’s no wonder dentists don’t want to show their faces in toothbrush advertisements. They are obviously cacking themselves laughing at this mad consumer world.

Anyway, I’ve decided on my brush. It’s a red one in a plain pack. I found it on the bottom shelf just across from a tube of simple fluoride toothpaste. The only hint of variety it seemed to offer was the description “medium” written on top. I would have got a “soft” but I seem to have toughened up.

Maybe I will raid the sewing kit later for some floss.